Book Review - Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism
Cowritten by Phillip Miller and Molly Devon Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns, a highly recommended/suggested introductory BDSM manual, is a fun-filled encompassing guide and introduction to the practice of BDSM.
Written from the perspective of a partnered D/s relationship and based upon their own experiences, the authors present an illustrative and approachable introductory BDSM reference read. Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns is a humorous and straightforwardly written title that is deceptively dense in its content of specialized skill and knowledge.
An introductory acknowledgement of the authors’ gender and orientation is presented in the beginning. This is an acknowledgement of styles and orientation applicable to those not sharing Miller and Devon’s “basic orientation.” Stating, “though a tremendous disparity of attractions, orientations, and kinks exists, we are all human and, therefore, the emotional underpinnings of SM apply to us all.” (ii) Experiences covered are the authors’ and are therefore representational of their M/F D/s dynamic.
The title was created out of the need for better and more accessible information. The authors as practitioners shared their concern for misinformation and engagement without knowledge or training; inherent risks or danger as well as positive contributions to cultivativating personal sexuality for those seeking information on BDSM and D/s dynamics inspired the creation of this text.
The conversational ease of the writing as well as the frameworks and features/practices covered are welcoming to the reader. Aspects of “sadomasomythology” are continually addressed as the reader is presented with useful and thorough information. Explicit in both general considerations and safety precautions all while embellished in humor and, most importantly, still supporting the education and exploration of the reader. A fairly comprehensive and expansive amount of information is conveyed.
Given that this book was originally published in 1995 and as of 2019 was on its thirty-third printing, the only notes I have on this title I am recommending involve small updates. The book is complete with a seemingly thorough though outdated Appendix. As far as area SM support groups, orgs and places for your shopping needs in Washington state, many seem to be no longer in existence or the contact info is out of date. And the included photos and infographics could use an edit to define the fuzzy nature of the photo and illustrative offerings.
Considerate, accessible, and a highly recommended primer. Enjoy.
Erin Payton Baker, MLIS
pronouns: she/her
(206) 229-2185
Head Librarian
Pan Eros Library
Miller, Philip and Devon, Molly. Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism. Northfield, Mystic Rose Books, 1995.